Terms & Definitions

written by Troy Hamilton
5 · 08 · 23

As I write this we are a couple of weeks from moving to a new location.  If you are reading this after June 2023 we have already moved and are in the new location.   This location is going to be much more accessible and less intimidating to new people than our original space.  So I thought it would be a good time to write a blog I’ve been meaning to write for a while now.  Here are a few of the common terms you will hear as you start this new adventure.  Please bear in mind this is a general outline of what these terms mean.  I have heard them used in a few different ways over the years.  However this will give you a general idea of what they mean.  

The Lifestyle:  Many times shortened to “The LS”  this is a general umbrella term for swinging, wife swap, open marriage, poly and most non traditional relationships.  Syn is a Lifestyle Club so by coming you have stepped foot into the Lifestyle.  

ENM: Ethical Non Monogamy. Very similar to The Lifestyle. ENM refers to having relationships with anyone but your primary partner in an honest way.  

NRE: New Relationship Energy.  When you meet someone new and you are a bit infatuated with them.  This can be tricky to navigate as you don’t want your primary partner to feel neglected or pushed aside.  When I met a new girl my ex would comment that she had “The new bitch smell.”  

Playing:  Usually referred to as an activity that is sexual in nature.  “We played with this couple”  means they had some type of sexual interaction with them.  

Soft Swap\Full Swap:  Soft Swap generally refers to oral sex only.  Full swap refers to full sexual interaction.  “Same room full swap”  would mean  they are open to most play with everyone in the same room.  “Girl only soft swap”  would mean the ladies play with each other while the men watch.  

Unicorn:  A unicorn is a solo lady that is open to playing with a couple.  They are referred to as unicorns because they are very rare and hard to find.  

Unicorn Hunting:  UH for short is the act of a couple trying to find a unicorn to play or date.   UH is often how couples make the first step into the LS.  UH can be controversial in some areas but as long as everyone is open and honest we have no issues with it at Syn.  Online it can be a bit tedious because it is so common.   I will one day do a whole blog on this subject as it’s fairly vast. 

Blue Fish:  Blue Fish refers to a solo male. This might be a fairly local term and not used as much in recent years.  I may be misremembering but I swear I remember when this term was coined.  It was a local website everyone used back then and the single male profiles were blue.  Single males can be very controversial in the LS and especially at this time.  Someone was complaining about them and referred to them as “Blue Fish” because there were so many.  He meant this in a derogatory manner but it stuck and is not used as derogatory anymore.  There are a lot of single males in the LS and many think of them as a “dime a dozen.”  I however disagree.  In today’s world a good solo male is just as sought after as an unicorn.  The key word being good.  This is due to the rise in popularity of:

Hotwife:  Hotwifing is a very popular dynamic in the LS.  It generally involves the lady playing on her own or being shown off in some capacity.  The male receives his pleasure from watching the wife receive hers.  There can be several levels of this dynamic from simply watching other men flirt with her to watching her please multiple men in one night.  This is a deep subject that goes beyond the scope of this blog.  

Stag & Vixen:  This is a very similar dynamic to Hotwife.  Honestly if you asked everyone the differences between the two you would get wildly different answers.  

Cuckold:  This one is different but similar.  In cuckhold situations the women tend to be more dominant.  Many times the “cuck”  will be humiliated and shamed while the lady is being serviced.  

Bull:  A Bull is a single male there specifically to service one or multiple ladies. This can be in conjunction with the hubby, other bulls or solo.  A good bull at Syn will play with multiple ladies throughout the night.  I have a few blogs on what makes a good solo stud.  

BBC\BWC:  Big Black Cock\Big White Cock.  

Dynamic:  I’ve used it a few times in the blog already.   A dynamic is what you are into.  I will often ask Syn Virgins what their dynamic is.  By that I mean are you unicorn hunting, hotwifing, couples swap, stuff like that.  “Not sure” or “just exploring”  are perfectly good answers.  

Poly:  If you hear someone say they are poly they most likely are referring to being Polyamorous.  That is again a very deep subject but in general means they are looking more for a relationship and less sexual gratification.  It’s not unusual to be both.  Meaning you swing for fun but open to more of a relationship.  

I think that’s the most common ones.  Any questions feel free to ask in the comments.

Troy Hamilton

I'm Troy, the owner of Syn.

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